~Paranoia Personified~

After the disapointment of last week; the liquidation of XL, and the following cancellation of our holiday, I spent this week firstly in The Gower, South Wales and then in a nice hotel with leisure facilities near Telford, Staffordshire.

The weather was generally ok - not raining, really, but not overly sunny either, until Thursday, when the sun did come out to play. It was nice to get away and relax, even if the surroundings weren’t quite a quaint Greek island.

This is now my last week of the Summer Break, having had roughly 4 months off, since my last exam way back in early June. I’ve three shifts left in the Creigiau Inn, and I’m also spending the week doing some teacher observation in Radyr Comp.

I’m hoping to get to the Cardiff game on Saturday, and then head back to Bristol that evening.

‘citing.

After sharing a David Ford cover last week, I thought I’d try and continue the love and share a Ford original, only, as yet, heard live at a few recent gigs. It’s a piano-based, soppy song, but I think it’s amazing - check it out.

David Ford - To Hell With the World (In Session)
(Right Click, Save As…)

24 hours after leaving my Cardiff home I’m now back. Having left at around 2215 last night, I caught the 2330 National Express coach to Gatwick with my girlfriend, Hannah, ready to catch our 7am flight from Gatwick to Skiathos. our destination of choice for our Summer holiday. The flight never left.

We arrived at Gatwick at around 4am, 3 hours before the flight, and an hour before the scheduled check-in time. We checked the departures board, and sure enough our flight was there, marked Zone J. We headed for Zone J, where found the XL check-in desks, manned, but with displays saying ‘desk closed’. Slightly confused, but aware there was an hour until check-in started, we headed upstairs for a quick breakfast, at what was now approaching 4:30am.

Hannah rushes up to me, “XL have gone bust.”
“what?”
“Someone just said, XL have gone bust.”
I can tell the full weight of what she’s saying hasn’t hit home, and I send her back to the queue while I process it myself.
Suddenly, everything fits: the camera crew we spotted on the way in; the check-in desks, manned, but closed.
A woman from a nearby table confirms the news. We’re going nowhere with XL airlines.

Roll forward through an hour of confusion, and we manage to speak to a Libra rep, who clarifies our position. As a client of Libra’s, who are still very much alive, they will try to get us out to Skiathos via another carrier - however, it’s 5:30am, and quite patently, everyone who can sort this is still in bed, presumabley, blissfully unaware of the events of the previous hours. “Wait ’til 8:30am… things should start to happen then.” We’re assured; she seems confident.

A few hours and pain au chocolat later, we’re sitting in the departure lounge when my phone rings; the minute there’s no number displayed, I know it’s Libra.
“I’m sorry Mr Colebourne… they’ve not been able to sort anything out, I’m afraid we’re going to have to refund your money.”

And so it begins…

Already 3 hours behind those who had booked with Kosmar (an XL company), we frantically attempt to scour the internet and phone travel agents in an attempt to secure a holiday out of Gatwick some time today. It’s fruitless. The few chances we had were snatched from us, as other people similarly frantically booked alternative holidays.

At around 10:15, about 6 hours after arriving, we accept defeat. We approach the National Express desk, and request to modify our return ticket from Friday 19th September, to asap. The next coach leaving is 10:45, and she’ll book us on, provided we pay a fee of £5 each. I protest, but it’s useless, and we pay up.

After attempted consolation with a meal and a few drinks, I’m now home, very tired, and rather upset. It’s sinking in… I’m not going on holiday. Sure, we’ll look tomorrow, try to scrape something together, and we might get lucky, but chances are, we’ll find nothing. Nothing we like we had… not for anything we can afford to pay.

During the day, I phoned several people, for a variety of reasons, and every single of one them was both sympathetic and helpful. I guess foremost, my Dad, who was awoken in the middle of the night by myself, somewhat panicked; followed by a girl at Monster travel, who I chatted to for about an hour, trying to secure a holiday; and finally the reps at the Libra desk, and the other reps, who were informative when the information from XL was just not comprehensive.

Fingers crossed, when you’re reading this, I’ll be jetting off somewhere warm!

I am a fan of Karaoke. I don’t think I can deny that. But unfortunately, I am one of a rare breed - I certainly know very few people who if I suggested ‘Karaoke?’ to them, would be overly enthusiastic. Or rather, I know few people who would be enthusiastic about the prospect of singing - many would be happy to sit and watch others, I’m sure.

So when my local pub landlady decided to throw a Karaoke night (largely, she claimed, due to my nagging), I was a little apprehensive, I must admit.

I think I need to clarify. When I say I’m a Karaoke fan, that means I enjoy it, immensely, however, I’ve only been to a few Karaoke nights. A couple of times abroad, and once, in Cardiff, in a deserted Lava Lounge on a weekday evening.

So when Saturday rolled around, I hadn’t settled on any sort of song choice. Previously, I’ve sung American Pie by Don McLean, and this was probably the front-runner in my head, but in a sober state, I didn’t fancy it. After skimming through their song book, I’d spotted ‘This Charming Man’ by The Smiths, which had prompted me to recall a beautiful cover of ‘There is a Light That Never Goes Out’, which David Ford often performs live. Certain I’d heard the original too, I scribbled this down on the form, and handed it in.

A few moments later, I was up there, mic in hand, and the lyrics appeared on the screen and started scrolling away… to some completely unfamiliar music. Convinced there’d been some mistake, I questioned, ‘Is this it?’ When a firm yes came back, I sat back down - there was no way I could fit those lyrics I knew so well to this alien sound track.

Back to square one, still no clue what track to sing. After another ten minutes getting no inspiration from the book, I went and looked what Ocean Colour Scene they had on their computer. Five tracks - no sign of Travellers’ Tune. Bugger. ‘Better Day’, however, was, a song which I’d sung previously, in Corfu, a few Summers previously. I gave my request in once more, not entirely satisfied, but the more I went over the song in my head, the happier I became.

It went down well, and I went on to sing ‘Young Hearts Run Free’ by Candi Staton and ‘I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues’ by Elton John, which was awesome to sing.

My lesson for the evening, was that the original ‘There is a Light…’ is nothing like Ford’s cover, and therefore the world has never heard the stunning rendition by the little-known song writer. Therefore, I shall share it with you. I hope you find it as beautiful as I do.

David Ford - There is a Light That Never Goes Out (Studio Version)
(Right Click, Save As…)

My first blog in ages, and possibly my most uninteresting I’ve ever posted (for almost anyone), however, I’m hoping they’ll be a niche that will find this post useful. After discussing with someone on the Steam Official Forums how not straight forward it is to set up a Team Fortress 2 listen server for public play, and how there are no instructions on the internet, I’ve decided to put together this guide.

Step One - Consider your bandwidth

A TF2 server needs to kick out around 6 - 10 KBps to each client playing on that server. This means that if you have a 256kbps upload (common in the UK) you’re only going to be able to host 3/4 players max, before it starts getting seriously uncomfortable. If you want to host for more than this, you might want to consider a gaming host - I would recommend Gibsworld.

Step Two - Configuring your router

So you’ve decided you still want to go ahead? Maybe you just want to farm some achievements with a few friends? To play behind a router, you need to forward the appropriate ports to your PC. How to do this type of port forwarding is extensively covered on many websites all over the internet, so I won’t go into it here. I can tell you though, you’ll need to forward UDP 27015.

Step Three - Running the server

Run TF2 normally through Steam. Once the menu loads, choose ‘Create Server’. On the first tab, you can choose a map, but don’t bother, as we’ll be changing it later. On the second tab, you can set up max players (like I said, I recommend 4) and the server name. Once you’ve done that, click ‘Create’.

Step Four - Configuring for public play

Once your server has loaded, open up the console. You’ll need to enable this in the Advanced options under Keyboard set up. You can then access it using the ` button (next to 1 key). Type in ’sv_lan 0′ without the quotes. This tells your server to accept connections from people outside of the subnet 192.168.x.x. Now this is the crucial step. In other Source games, such as CS:S or HL:Deathmatch your server would now work, however, in TF2 you need to invoke a map change. Do this now, by typing ‘map <map of your choice>’ into the console.

If you look in the console, you’ll see after the map change it reports that it connects to the steam servers, and is now VAC secure.

That’s it! Your server is now able to accept connections from the public, and with your ports forwarded correctly clients should be able to connect. To invite people to connect, tell them to type ‘connect <your external ip>:27015′ into the console. You can get your external ip here. They should connect without any problems.

(Optional) Step 5 - Getting your server listed

So your friends are noobs and can’t use the console? Fine, but be prepared for anyone to be able to join your server.

Once you’ve set your server to sv_lan 0, find out your external ip, and then type ip <external ip> into the console. Then invoke a map change as before. Your server should now be listed with all the others, and people should be able to connect to your game via Steam Friends. You may want to set sv_password though, to restrict access.

(Optional) Step 6 - Automagic

Sick and tired of all this typing huh? Ok, ok, we’ll set it up to be automatic.Go to Steam\steamapps\paranoiapersonified\team fortress 2\tf\cfg and create a file called listenserver.cfg. Edit it with notepad, and type:

//Listen server config

hostname “Server name here”
sv_lan 0
sv_password “choose password”
ip <external ip> //note, you’re external ip changes… only add this if you have a static ip from your ISP!
map <map of choice>

Now, when you load your server, your settings will be applied automatically, however, you will need to set ip, and then invoke another map change. You can also add other settings to listenserver.cfg, such as respawn timers etc.

Happy Gaming - hope this guide works!

After my recent hiatus from blogging due to my end of year exams (which went pretty well, I think, by the way), I thought I’d get back into the swing of things with a whine.

On the 27th April, I ordered a pair of trainers from Brantano’s online web shop. They said it would take two weeks to delivery - two weeks?? I was astonished, but had found a pair I liked, I couldn’t be bothered looking elsewhere, and aren’t they the shop that has all those adverts about making shoe shopping easy? I thought, yea, they’ll be fine.

I am still trainer-less. Here’s my correspondence with Brantano so far.

From: steve.colebourne@gmail.com [mailto:steve.colebourne@gmail.com]
Sent: 16 May 2008 14:22
To: CustomerService Brantano UK
Subject: Complaint: My recent order

Hi,

After selecting a pair of trainers that I liked from your website, I ordered them on 4/27/08, despite reading that you take two weeks to deliver. I find this astonishing, but is a separate issue somewhat.

Today, after realising it has been almost three weeks since placing my order, I logged on to your website to check my order, after receiving zero correspondence from yourselves since the order date.

To my annoyance, my order is marked as “not deliverable” - the meaning of this is not clear, nor is it explained anywhere, but presumably this means my order will not be fulfilled.

If this is the case, firstly, why on earth have I not been informed, and secondly, why is it still possible for me to order the same pair of trainers today? This is appalling customer service, and I expect the situation rectified asap.

Steve Colebourne.

From:Rachel Elmore [mailto:Rachel.Elmore@brantano.co.uk]
Sent: 16 May 2008 16:46
To: Steve Colebourne
Subject: Complaint: My recent order

Good Afternoon Steve

Many thanks for your email.

Firstly please do accept our most sincere apologies for the delays with your order and for any inconvenience caused.

I have looked into this for you and your item did arrive back with us; however this was marked. Therefore our system will automatically reset itself to request these from a further 3 stores. Once we are in receipt of these we can then send onto you as soon as possible. A discount would also be applied to your order as you are over our 2 week delivery schedule.

Once again, many apologies for these delays and for the inconvenience caused

Kind Regards

Rachel Elmore
Customer Care Dept
Brantano

And today, I sent this:

From: steve.colebourne@gmail.com [mailto:steve.colebourne@gmail.com]
Sent: 16 May 2008 14:22
To: CustomerService Brantano UK
Subject: Complaint: My recent order

Hi Rachel,

You’ll find below a copy of our correspondence from a month ago, when I expressed dissatisfaction at the level of service I received when placing an order for some trainers, roughly 3 weeks previously.

A month on, and I am still without my trainers.It has been *7 weeks* since I ordered my trainers from you. I logged into my account on your website this afternoon, to pursue this with you, and found that my order is now marked as cancelled. Presumably by yourselves, since it certainly wasn’t cancelled by me, and, yet again, I have not even been informed. You’re protocols fail to meet even a basic level of service - how can you possibly cancel my order, and not even tell me? If I had not checked, I would still be waiting - indeed, the order could have been marked cancelled for several weeks, unbeknown to me. Also, the product is still available on your website, so I see little reason why it should have been cancelled.

When I ordered the trainers from you, my current trainers were coming to the end of their life - they were already on the way, but a gig I went to recently finished them off. They’re still wearable, just, but the soles on both are rather detached from the main body of the shoe, so they let water in, and indeed much of the padding from the inside has worn away. As you can imagine, 7 weeks on, they’re now barely wearable. At the time of ordering, as I mentioned previously, I did think your 2 week delivery time was a little long, but, based on your recent tv advert campaign, I was under the impression that Brantano held high customer service standards, and that your aim is to make buying shoes simple, so I ordered anyway. Indeed, your own website states: “You see we believe that nothing but nothing should come between you and your love of shoes. So we do everything we can to make shoe buying as easy as humanly possible.”

I think you’ll agree, my experience has been anything but easy.

I trust this will be rectified asap.

Steve Colebourne.

I await a response.

Update:

Yesterday afternoon, I received a response from Rachel.

From:Rachel Elmore [mailto:Rachel.Elmore@brantano.co.uk]
Sent: 16 June 2008 13:54
To: Steve Colebourne
Subject: Complaint: My recent order

Good Afternoon Steve,

Many thanks for getting back to me…

Firstly please do accept our most sincere apologies for these lengthy delays with your order and for the inconvenience caused.

I have looked into this for you and I can confirm that we do have 31 pairs of these shoes available within our Business and we do not understand as to why this order has been cancelled; this normally happens when a customer requests for this order to be cancelled or it can be cancelled via our warehouse here at Head Office.

Therefore; please could you confirm whether you would like me to place an order for you here at Head Office directly and obviously we can sort a major discount out for you?

I look forward to hearing from you soon and once again; please do accept our most sincere apologies.

Kind Regards

Rachel
Customer Care Dept
Brantano

So it seems I pushed at the right buttons - hopefully my ‘majorly discounted’ trainers will be with me shortly! Result!